The way child trafficking and kidnappings are being highlighted in local media has made me super paranoid. Not just about all our children’s safety, but about how I engage with other people’s kids now.
Being loving and hilarious can be a curse. One of my favourite things to do – that goes way back to before my son was born and used to make my wife cringe with embarrassment – is whenever I came across little kids wandering around with their moms, I’d turn toward them and with my arms stretched out go “Come to daddy!” big smile and shit and just confuse the asses off them. It’s epically funny when they actually let me pick them up and be jacked about this nice new dad they have now.
It’s something that was always met with laughter, but I am legit worried that trying that now would get my ass kicked if not arrested, beaten and raped in prison. Prison rape happens every day, everywhere in every TV show and movie apart from Prison Break.
Now that’s an extreme example, but as an observer of sorts, it’s fun for me to watch random kids interact wherever I happen to be. I am concerned that I come across as though I’m casing play areas and malls and shit. What if people mistake me for a would-be kidnapper type and don’t immediately sense the nice uncle vibe I try and give off. Or even worse, the fact that I look like everyone else gives them a reason to suspect me. That whole “Kidnappers look just like you” thing. It could be anyone.
I could never downplay the seriousness of the problem though. Children are precious. They shouldn’t fall victim to that psycho shit.
I hate how what’s going on has even got me thinking I have to stop being my usual self around children, so their parents will chill out. I don’t want to mind my business so hard that I don’t notice a child in danger or not jump to aid one who’s gotten hurt.
Just the other day some random little girl at a play area Luke and I were at felt like I’m her friend for the day. She must have been 3yo. Asking me whether she knows how to play a game. It was cute at first, but then I was thinking “How the fuck am I supposed to know whether you know how to play that shit. We’ve never met!”
Suddenly I’m the asshole for not telling her what time I was planning on leaving. Frankly, I don’t see how that’s any of her business.
If anything, what’s going on here should have us paying closer attention to every child we come across. That whole it takes a village thing has never been more necessary.
Once again, children are precious. Even the annoying ones. The ones who won’t shut up and ask a million questions. The ones who badger you for no reason and at least confirm that I don’t look scary, but I’m approachable…meaning it’s a good time to take a new Facebook profile pic or update my Tinder.
A Guy with Kids 